How could a nightmare be refreshing, it was my mind fully realizing what went on.
So this one, the part that I remember, is of her trapping me against a wall in the bedroom and making me watch her have sex with those 28 or 29 guys, and laughing that maniac laugh she had on the porch that day between each one. I think mostly because she kept this illusion that she had asked for forgiveness and its all okay just like that. Needless to say, saying “I’m sorry” and going out the next day to find another is a full-blown narcissist.
Yeah, that is why I didn’t lose a wink of sleep over filing charges against you, reporting you to the SSA and IRS, etc. Its why I won’t cheer, laugh, or cry when you are homeless on the street, or better yet, having to put out for some guy to stay in his house (because you could never afford all your bills to start with). Irony would be the last one of course.
One other dream I had and remember. You showed back up here, 1 step from being homeless, no one will buy your stories anymore and crying you screwed up. I remind you of the day you told me you have not loved me in years. You threaten to kill yourself with a hand full of pills, and I remind you of what I said in 2015 and again on this porch this year – I’m done with trying to help you, I’m exhausted, I’m worn out, I have nothing left to give you, I tried, I failed – so do it so I can have them haul your corpse out of my driveway. You never listened; your fate is in your own hands now that is for sure.